I_love_salsa
Banned
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How do you flirt when dancing?
- Thread starter I_love_salsa
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Harmless flirting for me would be smiling, sexy dancing, and comments, etc. It wouldn't include anything to do with my hands. Also, the amount of time I have known my partner would be a factor in how I would flirt.
I know loads of women who complain about guy's hands... So, I think you need to be extra careful when you have them anywhere else but on the back or holding the girl's hand!!
I know loads of women who complain about guy's hands... So, I think you need to be extra careful when you have them anywhere else but on the back or holding the girl's hand!!
Big10
Son
I've had plenty of harmless Bachata dances and, I would venture to say, most of my Bachata dances are harmless.
If I want to add harmless flirting to my Salsa (or Bachata) dances, I will probably hold one of the lady's hands and then slowly loop our hands over her head. I may also gently brush my right hand down her arm after such a head loop, or when moving from closed to open position. The obvious things like smiling and eye contact are part of that, also.
For more meaningful flirting, I will probably dance a little closer (and more closed position moves in general), and my hand may move closer to her waist than higher on her back. I can think of a few other things too -- but I don't want to give away all of my secrets.
I flirt. Would be hard to explain how is it that I do it, but to sum it up, my attitude always screams flirt when I want to (which is 95% of the time)
Now when guys flirt, I take it like a big girl unless they do something inappropriate (hand somewhere it doesn't belong, moan, or touch my hair/face, etc...)
For the OP, I do not see a problem with him placing your hand on his chest, it happens frequently in salsa with some moves
Now when guys flirt, I take it like a big girl unless they do something inappropriate (hand somewhere it doesn't belong, moan, or touch my hair/face, etc...)
For the OP, I do not see a problem with him placing your hand on his chest, it happens frequently in salsa with some moves
sweavo
Changui
If you subtitute the word "dull" for "harmless" then I share that experience
For more meaningful flirting, I will probably dance a little closer (and more closed position moves in general), and my hand may move closer to her waist than higher on her back. I can think of a few other things too -- but I don't want to give away all of my secrets.
Now you're talking! Bachata either bores me or sweeps me away. I rarely have a bachata that's just fun.
But it wasn't Salsa!It was Bachata. We were dancing really close, I mean, our bodies were touching. And we were not even doing the side steps anymore, just shifting weights. He took my right hand and placed it on his chest and his hand stayed over mine.
Unless he's single, I'm not going to dance with him like that anymore! :nope:
Doesn't sound like flirting, more like connecting.
Yep I'm with you.
I dance most of my bachatas like that unless it's with someone who can't really lead it like that. If I'm really flirting rather than just sharing a fabulous dance then they'll know
kbitten
Son Montuno
But it wasn't Salsa!
Unless he's single, I'm not going to dance with him like that anymore! :nope:
would I be bad to you if I told you thats its a very common thing when you dance close to someone?
of course when you come "from "salsa you think its a different thing..many guys do that when they want to feel the girls body close to them, or a moment when the music is slower etc..OF COURSE its a lovely gesture but it doesnt mean flirting..means that he is really enjoying dancing to you..
Ok, I'll bite. So, do you have the opinion that non-single people should not dance bachata with the general public, because it's dangerous or extremely dull?
:twisted: Or does that add to the illicit appeal? (As in, you now dance bachata because it's potentially dangerous and you enjoy that?)
Having seen you dance bachata, I think I know your answer...
Near the end of the song, he took my right hand and placed it on his chest. He is cute
If he wasn't cute, you would be screaming murder and complaining
Like some were saying in the other thread, the same action can be interpreted as cute or creepy. Now that you explain, I know what exactly you mean. This is very common around here, especially when dancing Bachata in close hold. I wouldn't call it flirting. Accompanied by a look in the eyes or squeezing the hand a little firmer or using the arm around the waist to pull in the partner little closer can make it into a flirty move. Any move can be harmless or flirty, depending on the intent/play-acting.
Bachata is not like salsa. Most people tend to dance it with only certain other people (Though with the Bachata festivals that's changing too). In clubs it gets played only a few times. In my experience people either sit out or dance with someone they want to.
I think I really need to stay away from Bachata. That's just causing trouble!
Hmm... let's talk after a year
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Many new to Bachata have ambivalent feelings about it, like you do. After a while it becomes just another dance or like Sweavo you start living dangerously
You missed out!!
(Like Salsa) It depends on with whom you are dancing and the connection. I think the right connection makes Bachata really fun. Salsa you can still get away with an average connection. Not so in Bachata. You can have a great connection and fun dance without any flirting or playfulness.
When it comes to salsa, then I may flirt a bit while dancing, but not usually. But with bacahta, I'm definitely flirting with the ladies as I'm rather selective with whom I dance it. This includes for me eye-contact, smiles, depending on the move and my connection with the lady tenderly stroking her arm or her hair, etc. But all this depends on the lady and her reaction, which marks the line. If I notice that she's not comfortable or reacting in certain ways, then I stop or tone my flirting down to make her comfortable again. If this really happens, I might not ask that lady again for Bachata, since for me the dance calls for a bit of flirting with your partner, unlike salsa. So according to Sweavo, I'm living quite dangerously here.
sweavo
Changui
No, I'm only talking about me, I'm not trolling, and I'm not telling others what to feel when they dance.
This!
It starts to become a bit off, but speaking of bachata, I found it entertaining to observe how it became transformed in the last years around here. It used to be some side dance that was mainly danced with partners that know each other well.
Now, several venues in the Bay Area (Glaskat, Allegro BR) have separate room for bachata, there are full festivals around it, and the overall level of dancing (especially musicality) improved greatly, so in the right environment it can be as technically challenging and socially accepted as salsa.
There are even instructors specialized in this dance, some of them having very different styles.
For example Rodchata teaches a very close hold version, which reminds me of close embrace tango, but it is less challenging to lead. So after taking some classes ( even a private) with him, I started to enjoy dancing it very much. His way of dancing is most intimate, but far from being flirting: it is close with very subtle body movements and small steps, focusing on the music and partner: it also has the advantage that I can avoid eye contact, and just feel each other. I am a very shy guy, but (or let's say: therefore) it is the only way I dance bachata and it looks women like it as well, probably since they don't have to stare in my face either. And, it proved much less dangerous than I thought: I have not been kicked in the balls, so far.
Now, several venues in the Bay Area (Glaskat, Allegro BR) have separate room for bachata, there are full festivals around it, and the overall level of dancing (especially musicality) improved greatly, so in the right environment it can be as technically challenging and socially accepted as salsa.
There are even instructors specialized in this dance, some of them having very different styles.
For example Rodchata teaches a very close hold version, which reminds me of close embrace tango, but it is less challenging to lead. So after taking some classes ( even a private) with him, I started to enjoy dancing it very much. His way of dancing is most intimate, but far from being flirting: it is close with very subtle body movements and small steps, focusing on the music and partner: it also has the advantage that I can avoid eye contact, and just feel each other. I am a very shy guy, but (or let's say: therefore) it is the only way I dance bachata and it looks women like it as well, probably since they don't have to stare in my face either.
And, it proved much less dangerous than I thought: I have not been kicked in the balls, so far.
Big10
Son
If you subtitute the word "dull" for "harmless" then I share that experience
No, my use of the term "harmless" still includes having fun!Bachata has been part of the typical Latin club mix here in Houston for the last few years, and one of our most popular Salsa clubs will have the DJ play at least 2-3 Bachata songs every hour. Every local Salsa band has at least a one or two Bachata songs that will be in their nightly repertoire. In other words, I get a lot of chances on a regular basis to hear the music, become familiar with it, and experiment with ways to be musical, fun, harmless, and/or dangerous.
My individual personality is to try to be musical, fun, and harmless for the vast majority of my dancing. Luckily, there are many women around town who appreciate that, so I don't have to sit out too many Bachata (or Salsa) songs unless I specifically want to take a break. Of course, that generally harmless approach makes it much easier to tell when my intentions become "different."
If I used a body-to-body embrace all the time as my "default," then it's more difficult to create some flirty variation without being just crude about it. 
Having a set of moves for open position, plus standard closed position, plus body-to-body, allows for a broader range of messages that can be sent to your partner -- while still having fun at the same time.
kbitten
Son Montuno
If I used a body-to-body embrace all the time as my "default," then it's more difficult to create some flirty variation without being just crude about it.
bachata flirt boy
Salsamakossa
Changui
He is cute, so I thought it was a good place for my hand (and it allowed me to check out what was underneath his shirt.
I think you said it all here
. If he were not cute, and you did not want to check out what was underneath his shirt, it would be a completely different story, no matter what anyone says here lady...